I have a giant, delicious Heath Bar flavored (yum!) iced coffee in front of me, and today, I surely earned every single sip. I also fed my kids strawberry frosted donuts (with rainbow sprinkles) for dinner tonight. No joke. Don’t worry, they had some ham and cheese later on for snack, but tonight, donuts were about all I could handle.

The kids were up way too early for my liking today, but I just went with it. I figured they’d take better naps because of it. It’s almost like I don’t even know my kids, because naps barely even happened today. Maybe I need a second ice coffee…

Anyway, after an oatmeal fight this morning that began over the wrong colored bowls and spoons, we spent some time outside. We met a police officer and a utility worker who were doing some work in front of our house. The kids loved seeing the big trucks and interacting with everyone. I had a brief thought about leaving them outside with their new friends while I napped, but the parental / responsible me took over instead. We came back inside, built some block castles that were promptly knocked over, folded some laundry that ended up mixed with toy-play food, and watched squirrels hump in our backyard. At this point, I figured watching cartoons would be better for their little minds instead of continuing to watch the “wrestling” squirrels, so we all sat down to relax and watch some tv. As soon as my “really big booty” (as Taylor says) touched the comfy couch cushions, there was a knock at the door. No, it wasn’t Publisher’s Clearing House telling me I was now rich and could quit my day job. It was a man from the power company telling me they were doing some work and were shutting off electricity to my house for a few hours. Fantastic. It was just what I needed when I had three kids who wanted to watch tv. We also lost our air conditioning privileges in the 90 degree heat. We couldn’t even leave the house as I was waiting on a contractor who ended up not coming. Everyone was grumpy, but we survived just fine.

The kids were starting to smell like wet gym socks, so I bathed them. In retrospect, I probably should have let them continue to attract flies instead of cleaning their little bodies because it was almost more work that it was worth. I filled up the tub and turned around to get towels and wash cloths (rookie move, I know) and one small boy starting sword fighting what I can only imagine to be a ghost with the toilet bowl brush.

As if that wasn’t enough fun, when I got him out of the tub and asked him if he needed to use the toilet before we put his diaper on, he promised he didn’t and then peed on my feet, the bath mat, and the tile floor. He quickly grabbed his little pistol and aimed at the radiator and wall, but thankfully he was empty by then. Joseph, I’m referring to you, by the way. I had my phone in my hand and was able to snap a quick picture when he was finished (and splashing in it) only because I quickly grabbed the phone as Jackson was trying to dunk it in the toilet. I should get a medal for that move alone.

After everything was cleaned up in the bathroom and the kids were all dressed, Taylor graciously let them play in her room while I ran downstairs to start urine soaked laundry. When I came upstairs, Joseph greeted me at the steps with what I thought was blood all over his face. After quickly determining it wasn’t blood, I ran to see what he got into and caught Jackson in the act of rubbing T’s “lipstick” all over his freshly washed face. He kept repeating “so beautiful, so beautiful!”

I cleaned them up and decided to get out of the house and get the boys haircuts. They desperately needed them. Since we were in public, the kids were all pretty well behaved and were so good sitting in the chair. The barber even complimented me on my parenting and them on their behavior and said “Your boys are so good! Usually, when kids come in, we want to drink afterward!” I will gladly take that compliment and store it for a rainy day.

Thank goodness it is bedtime. I will kiss their sweet faces and prepare for another day.